The Spring Purse

This is my blog, so I can post what I want to, right? I need to vent. I am feeling irritated with two homeschooling issues brought up by one of the wonderful boards I frequent.

First--Under the category of THEN WHY BOTHER?--
There was a recent post by someone who claims she wants to homeschool her child, but then goes on to say that she's looking for a way to do it that won't require anything from her. (and here I've edited something very uncharitable...) Oh. MY. What's up with that? I get the "I'm overwhelmed" feelings, and I really do empathize with wanting to give but feeling drained. But why do we let that be an excuse for such behaviour? I just want to scream, "COME ON!" Put the kid in a decent preschool and move on. A poor homeschool is NOT better than a good preschool. Some think it is, just by virtue of being at home. That's such crap.

Then--Under the category of RELAX, AND ALLOW YOUR CHILD TO BE A CHILD--
So many times, people are afraid to let their kids explore with art materials, or make messes in general. OOO, it's messy! OOOO, they might spill! OOO, MUD! OH HORRORS! Geez, Louise. Can't you clean up spills? Doesn't paint wipe off? Ever hear of a wet rag and some newspapers? Because of Mom's (or Dad's, or whatever adult--even teachers at school!) obsession with neatness and cleanliness, germophobia, or simple anxiety about product over process, the child never gets to DO anything that might create a tiny bit of chaos. Art has to be confined to coloring (and that better be with washable crayons and a coloring book, and it better be "within the lines..."), juice has to be poured for the child, outside can't be explored. I just want to shake these people. The kids sometimes survive intact (kids are quite resilient), but what do they miss?

The fact is, Creating and Exploring (and they do deserve Capital Letters) are the work of childhood. Neatness, orderliness and yes, even safety, are not what they are cracked up to be. When these get in the way too much, children become fearful of making mistakes, and of "looking ridiculous." Adults sometimes just need to step back and let the process reveal itself. Let the kid explore. Let the kid risk--
Risk. There is a fine balance here, between letting that risk happen and keeping our kids safe. Yes, we definitely have to provide safety, but my Goodness, can't we do so without squelching the heck out of every creative endeavor?

So, I guess my point is, get off your ass, stop thinking only of your own comfort level in raising your children, and see this time in both your life and the lives of your kids as precious and worth the investment. It goes FAST. It blazes by. One day, they will stop giving messy kisses. They will become so capable that you will be fazed out--just like that, you will become unnecessary for their survival. Instead of a wardrobe staple like black pants, you will become the Spring Purse. Nice, but not essential.

That's our job, isn't it? To become the Spring Purse. Nice to have around, full of good information, but if left behind, not crucial to one's day--because they've learned, you see. They've learned that mistakes are part of the process of becoming whole. That creativity doesn't fit within the lines, and that sometimes the paint spills, and that's OK.

Vent over.